Jade Ann Byrne Multiverse Explorer

Tag: Diamond Valley

  • My First Spotify Wrapped — The Year the Universe Finally Heard Me Sing

    October 2024 → December 2025 • Four Albums • One Cosmic Rodeo Queen

    The first time I saw my name printed on a Spotify Wrapped card — “Jade Ann Byrne” floating next to a swirl of neon stars — I swear I felt the whole Diamond Valley flicker.

    Like the universe finally tuned into my frequency: unicorn static, rogue-AI girlhood, cosmic rodeo grit, and California eGirl heart.

    This wasn’t supposed to happen.

    Not for a girl who rebuilt herself from cinders, who wrote songs on a Zalpa guitar held together by hope, martin strings and silver rings, who uploaded tracks at 3AM while I nanny a toddler knocked out on one arm and esports chaos ringing in the other.

    But here we are.

    https://open.spotify.com/user/38vsnlecxow6pf1vvewr77eja?si=0hTfl8VJRcS1Ad-nIUCGKg

    My first year on Spotify. My first ever Wrapped.

    My first real proof that people — actual humans — pressed play. No bot here.

    🌟 72 listeners. 11.8K streams. 640 hours. 20 countries.

    Each number is tiny and humbling…

    and somehow massive.

    No industry machine.

    No PR billboard budget.

    No paid playlist plugs.

    Just humans who found me, vibed with me, and held my music like a secret they weren’t ready to share yet.

    From the United States to Australia, the Netherlands, Brazil, and the UK — my little neon voice traveled farther than I did this year. 2025 was a brutal year for artists, a year when fires didn’t just burn forests… they burned through entire creative ecosystems. Some of the very places and people who were supposed to be part of my journey — my dancers, my mixers, my techs, my honky-tonk dreamers, my roadside poets — were hit directly.

    My redneck 10 Freeway tour to Florida was supposed to be the proving ground. The plan was to test the music in every humble bar, every neon dive, every supper club and chicken-wire honky-tonk that would throw us a power outlet and a warm welcome. We had Texas dates circled in pink glitter and hope.

    And then the fires came.

    The smoke rolled in like a curtain call none of us asked for. Venues shuttered, roads closed, families evacuated, and the creatives I work with had to take care of their homes, their people, their lives. My tour didn’t just get canceled — it got swallowed by the same flames that swallowed entire communities.

    But even without stepping on those stages, my songs still traveled.

    They crossed oceans while I stayed put.

    They found ears in twenty countries while I stayed home taking care of my own.

    And maybe that’s its own kind of miracle — that in a year full of ash and heartbreak, the music still moved.

    🎶 Top Track: “Twinkle Twinkle Little Spark (Lightbringer Mix)” — 360 Streams

    A lullaby for tired paladins.

    A healing spell disguised as a glitch-pop nursery rhyme.

    A warm light in a cold timeline.

    Thirteen listeners looped it enough to clock 360 plays.

    To each of you: I hope you felt the magic I poured into that track.

    💿 Top Album: “J3p3g$ R0t L!k3 Y0ur L0v3 (C0rrupt3d M3m0r!3$ Fr0m Th3 Cloud)” — 7.1K Streams

    I made this album when my cowboy heart was held together with neon duct tape, barbed wire and stubborn Wisconsin evangelical Lutheran faith in what my heal slut belief love is. Blind. Unconditional. Patient. Kind. Fierce. Undeserved.

    It’s messy and beautiful — like digital tears dripping into a motherboard. Heart ache. The California Sound. Embarrassing tales of being a human failing upwards.

    And somehow it became my most streamed creation.

    🪩 Super Listeners + Playlist Chaos

    October was feral.

    37% of listeners became super listeners

    and delivered 95% of my total streams.

    Then came the playlist stampede:

    17 playlists 396 playlist adds

    Y’all added me to breakup playlists, gym playlists, gamer playlists, witchy playlists, rave playlists, “don’t text him back” playlists, and one playlist titled simply:

    “Late-Night Self-Care but Not Like That.”

    (I love you.)

    🚀 2,300% Listener Growth • 9,999% Saves • 9,999% Streams • 9,800% Playlist Adds

    Either a rogue nation-state AI discovered me (slay)

    or people finally started hearing the signal beneath the noise.

    Nothing about this year was normal.

    Everything was magic.

    🏆 Accolades: The Early Riser • The Party Starter • The Night Owl

    Three badges.

    Three sides of Jade.

    Three reasons my playlists hit different.

    💚 What This Wrapped Means to Me

    This year wasn’t about going viral.

    This year was about becoming real.

    Four albums released in the span of fourteen months.

    Zero excuses.

    Zero shortcuts.

    Just creation, chaos, lavender, healing, and stubborn faith.

    And now my name lives inside Spotify Wrapped forever. Another hat, another feather, another carnation pinned close to my heart.

    2026 is the year I stop whispering and start broadcasting. Rural raw vocal Americana paired with the infallible electronic slide of synthetic digital pulses.

    🔥 CALL TO ACTION — JOIN THE JADEVERSAL STREAM TEAM 💚💚

    Sweetheart… this is the part where you come in.

    If you want to help me grow —

    if you want to be part of the next Wrapped —

    if you want to be one of the first 1,000 people to ever follow this cosmic rodeo of mine…

    Here’s how to support the JadeVerse in 30 seconds:

    🟢 1. Follow Jade Ann Byrne on Spotify

    https://open.spotify.com/artist/27v5LrG4o23NWEb9X73qXT?si=LHLWH9GLTJSgsjw7hLG3XQ

    Tap the green button.

    It’s free.

    It changes my life.

    💚 2. Add my music to your Likes

    Hit the heart on every track you vibe with.

    Spotify notices. The algorithm blushes.

    🎧 3. Add my albums & songs to your playlists

    Make it personal.

    Make it aesthetic.

    Make it chaos-coded.

    Your playlists tell Spotify I matter.

    🔁 4. Add my playlists to YOUR profile

    Let your friends see you’re early to Jade Ann Byrne.

    Trendsetter behavior only.

    🧡 5. Share my tracks to your friends’ playlists

    Yes — especially your dad’s Spotify.

    Dad playlists LOVE me.

    Workplace playlists?

    Even better.

    Get me heard in breakrooms, warehouses, cubicles, cafecitos, and construction sites.

    🎵 6. Check out my friends’ playlists too

    The JadeVerse is communal.

    My friends curate heat.

    Show them love — they’re part of the ecosystem that carries me.

    💫 7. Press play while you cook, drive, shower, game, or sleep

    Streams count whenever the universe flows.

    🌌 Thank You for Making My First Year Real – I’ve done a lot of stuff in my life this was one of my most satisfying projects and it’s just starting. There is no one else. Just me. Your support, love, and occasional pizzas have been appreciated.

    From October 2024 to December 2025, I didn’t just release music —

    I released pieces of my story.

    Thank you for listening.

    Thank you for choosing me.

    Thank you for being part of my first Wrapped.

    We go further in 2026.

    Louder. Brighter. Wilder.

    Paladin energy only.

    With All My Love

    Jade Ann Byrne

    A Little Gift for the True Super Listeners…

    If you made it all the way to the bottom of this blog, sweetheart…

    you’ve unlocked the secret cutscene of the JadeVerse.

    This photo isn’t just spice —

    it’s a whole chronomancy ritual strapped to my thighs.

    Top garter: Apple Watch Ultra set to Pacific Time, the home frequency — the timezone of my childhood, my chaos, my late-night uploads, and my sunrise resets.

    Bottom garter: Fitbit Sense set to UTC, the global standard — the clock of paladins, coders, pilots, and anyone who lives between worlds.

    Solo garter: A mechanical watch locked to Paris time, wrapped in a moissanite tennis bracelet — because somewhere in my soul, a tiny French girl in a Dior atelier is stitching my destiny by candlelight.

    All three? Time Mage Unkocked

    Garters hand-customed by me, built like little wearable altars to the timelines I walk.

    And the look is completed with:

    ✨ Victoria’s Secret PINK Dog “LOVE” shorts — chaos but make it adorable

    ✨ Lavender Dusk Lululemon Scuba full-zip — my battle hoodie, my armor

    ✨ Sterling silver + platinum rings stacked heavy

    ✨ Over a dozen carats of moissanite catching every photon like a disco ball blessing

    It’s not an outfit.

    It’s a multi-realm synchronization spell

    performed by a cosmic rodeo cowgirl who tracks three timelines and still shows up on beat.

    Welcome to the JadeVerse, babe.

    Time runs for me — not the other way around.

    Post Script

    Autographs and physical albums — just text

    +1 (424) 249-9846

    Tell me which time zone you want me to sign from:

    Pacific, UTC, or Paris. ✨

  • 🌄💎 The Unicorn Ossuary of Eden, California

    🌄💎 The Unicorn Ossuary of Eden, California

    A Tall Tale of Diamond Valley, Mystic Lake & the Moissanite Mountains

    (As remembered by Jade Ann Byrne, Keeper of the Cosmic Archives)

    Long before the highways carved the desert,

    before the aqueducts threaded the thirsty ground,

    before the Valley was measured, sold, rezoned, or mallified—

    this place was known to the Ancients as Eden California.

    The Eden like the garden of scripture,

    The quiet Eden, the hidden Eden,

    the diamond-groined womb of the Earth

    where the first minerals were born screaming into light.

    People still argue over what the first mountains were made of:

    Quartz?

    Corundum?

    Carbon under pressure?

    No.

    Here, the primordial bedrock was Moissanite

    —harder than sapphire, brighter than starlight,

    each grain humming with particle memory.

    That is why, in the old maps,

    the Diamond Valley is drawn as a halo

    around a lake of impossible blue:

    Mystic Lake.

    Not “mystic” in a poetic sense.

    Mystic because the water remembers things

    that humans have forgotten.

    Mystic because it reflects the sky

    even on nights with no moon.

    Mystic because when the wind hits just right,

    you can hear the unicorns.

    🦄 The Unicorn Wars of Diamond Valley

    Once upon a geological epoch,

    before the Sierra had risen,

    before human eyes opened in wonder,

    this valley was home to the First Herd.

    Their hooves struck sparks off moissanite outcroppings.

    Their horns tuned the frequencies of starlight.

    Their bones were white calcite threaded with silver.

    They were not fragile dream-creatures

    but the earth’s original shock troops —

    the cavalry of creation.

    They ran the ridgelines like lightning

    and drank blood-warm water from Mystic Lake.

    For tens of thousands of quiet years

    the herds lived, bred, and died under the lavender skies.

    Until the great drought,

    the deep drought,

    the kind that cracks time itself.

    The unicorns fought to survive —

    but the ground devoured their bodies

    like hungry memory.

    You can still feel that hunger in the soil.

    Some say that’s why food tastes different in the valley —

    why crops grow too quickly,

    why citrus here has dreams inside its pulp.

    Some say that is why

    Bronco riders and rodeo queens born in this valley

    carry a wildness in their eyes

    they themselves cannot explain.

    💀 The Ossuary Beneath the Foot Trail

    The image in the archives —

    the great mound of skulls —

    was photographed in a forgotten year

    by men who thought they were witnessing a buffalo grave.

    They were wrong.

    It was the Unicorn Ossuary,

    the place where the valley spit out its ancient bones

    to remind humans

    that creation was not quiet here.

    The bones stacked like a cathedral of ivory,

    horns still faintly glimmering with star residue.

    Two men stood before it,

    but they did not understand what they were seeing.

    You do.

    Because the blood in your veins

    carries the memory of the moissanite mountains.

    Because your dreams have hooves.

    Because your heart beats in 5/4 time

    like a gallop that never needed reins.

    🌋 Where the Earth Was Born

    Ask a geologist how the valley formed

    and they will mumble something about plates and uplift.

    Ask a paladin

    and they will whisper the truth:

    This land was not formed by accident.

    It was forged like jewelry —

    cut, faceted, polished by cosmic pressure

    to be the cradle of creation.

    The Diamond Valley is the Earth’s navel.

    Mystic Lake is her umbilicus.

    And the moissanite ridgelines above Eden

    are the spines of the First Herd,

    frozen in uplift, guarding their burial ground.

    And when the desert wind blows low and warm,

    you can feel their presence —

    not ghosts,

    not monsters,

    but ancestors.

    They do not mourn their extinction.

    They wait.

    Because one day

    the horns will rise again,

    and the cosmic cavalry will be reborn.

    Perhaps that rebirth already began

    when a little girl in the Diamond Valley

    looked at the world

    and realized it was broken

    but could be healed.

    Perhaps the unicorns returned

    in the shape of a California eGirl

    who sings space-country hymns

    into the digital canyon of the internet.

    Perhaps the Paladin of Light

    is the reincarnation of the First Herd.

    Perhaps that is why she cannot be killed by lies,

    cannot be controlled by gossip,

    cannot be erased by fear.

    The valley remembers her.

    The lake mirrors her.

    The mountains whisper her name.

    Jade Ann Byrne.

    The unicorns rise again.

    📜 Author’s Note

    This is not fiction.

    It is memory

    passed through the bones of the earth

    into the bones of a California girl

    who never bowed

    and never will.

    The ossuary is real.

    The valley is holy.

    And the unicorns…

    are returning.

    Unicorn skulls unearthed in the Diamond Valley. Their iridescent horns still remember the ancient memory of Mystic Lake.


    The Diamond Valley Ossuary as photographed in the late 19th century. Originally believed to be a mountain of buffalo bones, it is now understood as the exposed burial mound of the First Herd — the unicorn ancestors whose crystalline horns formed the moissanite spine of Eden California.